


Margaret Virginia Stark

by paxmonroe



Series: Baby Stark (doo doo doo doo doo doo) [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Awesome Pepper Potts, Civil War Team Iron Man, Female Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, James "Rhodey" Rhodes is a Good Bro, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Parent Tony Stark, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Protective Tony Stark, The Accords, Toni Stark - Freeform, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark finally gets therapy, but also Steve is growing ok?, single parent tony stark, so not totally Team Cap bashing, yeah that tag was needed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:48:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22313521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paxmonroe/pseuds/paxmonroe
Summary: It has been four years since the media-dubbed "Civil War," and the Rogues are finally coming home. Toni Stark is definitely 100% ok with this. Yep, no issues here. It's not like Steve Roger had broken her heart and left her to die, pregnant and alone, in a Siberian bunker or anything... Well, okay that's exactly what happened. But Toni knows that the world is safer when the Avengers are together, so she is going to make this work even if it means exposing the most important person in her life to the man she never wanted her to meet: her father.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Baby Stark (doo doo doo doo doo doo) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1058000
Comments: 37
Kudos: 539
Collections: Awesome parent tony Stark, Female Toni Stark, Parent Tony Stark, The Iron Capsicle: a collection of Steve Rogers/Tony Stark fanfiction





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> FULL DISCLOSURE: There is a good chance this will never be finished or will take many moons to do so. I have been writing this since last February and have put off posting it because of the pressure to update consistently. However, that seems like a dumb reason as I adore and reread some old fanfics that I know will never be updated. So here you go, I have quite a few chapters that I will be posting weekly as I attempt to continue writing my way to the end while also attempting to graduate college this May, so I'm a busy boi but we got this, right? Right.

Toni Stark was frozen. She could count on one hand the number of times she had hesitated to walk through a door. Her entire career relied on her tenacity, prowess, confidence. She simply didn’t  _ allow  _ hesitation. But nevertheless, here she was, standing in front of a UN conference room, poised to walk in but simply unable to do so. 

“I’m right behind ya, Tones,” Rhodey reassured her. 

God bless Rhodey. She may not be able to brave every situation alone, but with her brother on her side, Toni could do anything. So with a quick breath, Toni swallowed her nerves, straightened her shoulders, and burst through the door in a way that made sure no one could sense any of the previous hesitations.

Toni walked immediately to the end of the table without looking up. She knew  _ he  _ would be looking, and that was just, let’s delay that. Taking her seat at the head of the table, she watched as Rhodey took the one to her right and finally looked up at the faces she hadn’t seen in four years. Natasha looked the same as always, a different hair color, but similarly shifty eyes. Sam? Sam, Toni decided on, looked worse for wear but exuded less animosity than expected. The witch was, well, she was the witch, and she seemed to be sulking but not outright threatening. Barnes had his eyes trained on the table in front of him and looked like he wanted the floor to swallow him whole.  _ Relatable.  _ And then, Steve. Steve, of course, met her eyes, his mouth spasming into an awkward, sad smile before righting itself to neutral. Toni didn’t allow her expression to change. 

Finally, at the other end of the table, Fury cleared his throat. “Talkative bunch today. Let’s cut the shit and go straight to why we are all crammed into this meeting room. Captain Rogers, you and your team have agreed to work with a team of lawyers for a year to try and come to an agreement on the Accords. If you cannot come to an agreement, you will retire. If you don’t agree with that last statement, keep it to your damn selves because I don’t want the headache,” Fury paused to give each Rogue a hard glare before continuing, “For the year, the UN has agreed that it would be safest for you all to reside in the Avengers Compound run by Ms. Stark. If you threaten the lives of  _ any  _ inhabitants, your immunity will be immediately revoked and punishment swift. Do I make myself clear?”

Fury stared down each Rogue until he got a nod from everyone. “Good. Ms. Stark, do you have the forms?”

“Yep,” Toni said shortly as she passed along the folders, overly aware of all the eyes on her. 

“Confidentiality agreements? What are these for?” Steve— _ Rogers  _ asked.

Rhodey slipped his hand under the table to squeeze Toni’s knee reassuringly.

“Those are a requirement of residing in the Compound. We have an—occupant whose existence must remain off the radar of the press,” Toni answered. “I would need all forms signed before I could say more.”

With a decent amount of grumbling, everyone signed the forms and sent them down the table. After checking each paper for signatures, Toni took a deep breath and put up a holographic picture of Maggie. 

“Meet Margaret Virginia Stark, my daughter, and, as far as the world knows, nonexistent.”

Steve’s widening eyes and sputtering was probably more amusing than it should’ve been. 

“Your daughter? How old is she?” Natasha broke the silence. 

“Yep, flesh and blood, nine months, labor, the whole shebang. And she’s four,” she valiantly fought the effort to roll her eyes at the gasps around the room. “Yep geniuses, she’s biologically part super-soldier. But she doesn’t know who her dad is and that will  _ not  _ change. And I swear to god, Rogers, if you try to start a custody battle, you  _ will  _ lose. I’ve had the best lawyers in the country, scratch that, the  _ world,  _ look over any potential case, and your chances are less than zero. So don’t you dare drag my kid through that.”

The room was silent for a minute as everyone took that in. 

“Wonderful, so I’ll see you all at the compound later. Bye sour-patch,” Toni concluded with a nod to Fury as she collected the forms and stood briskly, walking out of the room without a look back, smirking slightly when she heard Rhodey follow.


	2. Chapter 2

Toni knew that the Rogues were coming, logically anyway. But somehow it still caught her by surprise when the doorbell rang a few hours after the meeting. And when she says “by surprise,” Toni means it. She was in an Elsa gown, Margaret dressed fully as Princess Anna, and Peter, sweet baby Peter, was valiantly playing the role of Kristoff, hat and all. Vision was experimenting in the kitchen, which meant the area had an... interesting smell. Rhodey was further in the compound doing PT, and Pepper was typing away at her laptop, ignoring the  _ Frozen _ chaos in favor of improving the stock of Stark Industries. So one adult wasn’t bad. 

All that being said, Toni’s ideal encounter with the Rogues coming into the compound did not include her being in a snow dress, with a crown on, and carrying a stuffed snowman. But that is what she ended up with. 

“Right, you’re all coming today. That’s today, wonderful. Um, come in?” 

Trying to ignore Sam’s raised eyebrow and Natasha’s smirk, Toni led the Rogues into her living room. 

“Welcome to Arendelle, who goes there?” Margaret stated royally from her perch on Peter’s shoulders.

Shockingly enough, it was Sam who took up the torch. Bowing regally, he looked up at my daughter’s shining face and said, “My queen—” 

“Princess Anna, mommy’s Queen Elsa,” Margaret corrected and grinned when Toni winked at her. 

“Princess Anna,” Sam continued, “I am Sir Sam, airing from the mighty kingdom of Chicago. It would be an honor to be granted entry to your castle.”

“I suppose you can come in with your guests,” Margaret offered mercilessly, giggling.

“You heard the princess, come in,” Toni added, trying to ignore the star-struck expression on Steve’s face as he met his daughter for the first time. “Maggie, remember how I told you more superheroes were going to come live with us?”

Maggie’s brows furrowed in thought, and Toni couldn’t help her smile. Her daughter was too damn cute. “The ‘vengers?”

“Exactly! Well, here they are.”

However, instead of noting any excitement, Maggie crossed her arms and glared down from where she sat on Peter’s shoulders. “The ‘vengers are mean!”

“Why would you say that, sweetie?” Toni asked, honestly confused, ignoring the flash of hurt on Steve’s face.

“Peter said they hurt you and made you lay in bed the whole time I was in your belly, and that made you really sad.”  
“Oh really,” Toni raised a brow as she eyed down her son, who looked away sheepishly. “The Avengers and I had a disagreement, but you have nothing to worry about. We are on the same side. And I had to be in bed because you are just too strong for me. Even when you were a little bean of a baby, my body had trouble.” Toni reached over to grab her little girl off Peter’s shoulders and set her on her feet.

“Because of my gift?”

“Got it in one, baby girl,” Toni answered with a tickle that made Maggie squeal. “Now, I think we have a more pressing issue to discuss. You, honey, are too stinky to be a princess! We need to get you cleaned up quickly, or else I have to revoke your crown privileges.”

“Nooooooo, mommy princesses don’t take baths!” 

“Actually, they take lots of baths. They get sweaty from all of their royal balls.”  
“Says who?” Maggie countered, hands on her hips.

“Says mommy and I’m a queen, so I make all the princess rules. And I say, this princess needs a bath,” if Toni heard a few Rogues chuckle, she definitely ignored it. Yep, no warm feelings with Steve’s low rumble. Not a one.

Deciding against continuing this argument in front of an audience, Toni swooped up her daughter and threw her, gently, over her shoulder.

“Peter!! Save me!” Maggie flailed dramatically.

“I got you, Princess Anna!” Peter exclaimed heroically as he sent a web to latch onto her wiggling fingers. 

Toni stopped in her tracks, turning around slowly, “Oh Peter, sweet, sweet Peter, did you forget what happens when you web up your sister?”

“No! It’s just a little! Barely there!” He protested.

“I don’t make the rules, Peter. I just enforce them.”  
“That’s a lie, you literally _do_ make the rules.”  
“Well I’m your mom so,” Toni stuck out her tongue to maturely emphasize her statement. “If you web up Maggie, you bathe Maggie.”

“Peter bath! Peter bath!” Maggie began to chant as Toni handed her over with an evil smirk.

“That’s right, baby. Peter bath.”  
“Ugh,” Peter moaned as he began walking out of the living room, sister in tow. 

“Love you too!” Toni shouted back gleefully. 

Deciding that continuing to pretend the Rogues weren’t there was the best plan, Toni walked over and sat across from Pepper at the dining table.

“So, you have two kids now?” Natasha asked as she invited herself to the table. 

Pepper stopped typing long enough to send an icy glare at the agent, her only protest so far.

“I adopted Peter three years ago. His aunt died, and I was the closest thing he had to family. I told him to call me whatever he preferred, and he eventually settled on mom,” Toni finished with a shrug. “But enough about my kids, your rooms are where you left them. Nothing has changed, outside of Pepper and Rhodey moving in permanently and my lab being completely off-access. If you need me while I’m in there, ask Friday to relay the message. And Maggie is never without one of her guardians or myself, but I swear if I see any sneaking around to try and talk to her behind my back, I will have you out of here in an hour. And it goes without saying that if any of you try to harm her, you will be maimed permanently in a way that will make you wish I had just killed you—”

“And I will remove your eyes with my Louboutins if you touch Maggie, Peter, _or_ Toni,” Pepper added helpfully.  
“—great addition, this is why you get the big bucks. Always covering all the asses, incredible. So any questions?” Toni finished with a sarcastically, innocent smile.

Eventually, all the Rogues awkwardly wandered off to their new bedrooms. Steve was the last to go. He stood patiently in the entrance, and Toni could feel his eyes burning holes in her back. But she refused to look back, maintaining a false bravado amidst a meaningless conversation with Pepper. Eventually, he sighed quietly and turned to follow the others.

“He’s gone,” Pepper muttered when he was out of super-soldier eyeshot.

Toni let her head fall to the table, cushioned by her arms.

“You were fairly convincing if it’s any consolation.”

Toni groaned loudly in response. 

This was going to suck.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! The response for this story has been amazing, y'all are so nice for all your comments! One thing to point out, you will soon learn that Siberia went down differently (some things even Toni doesn't know yet), but the important part is that Steve never laid a hand on Toni. As an abuse survivor, I understand the concerned comments about this fic being Stony endgame (which it is), but I want you to know that I am changing up the details to make Siberia a trust issue more than a violence one. Lastly, I'll be posting chapters once a week!

To everyone’s  _ immense  _ surprise, having all the Avengers under one roof again caused a shit storm in less than twelve hours. And by everyone, Toni means that not a single soul was surprised. They had all gathered to have a meal of spaghetti, which Toni had made with Maggie in tow. But minutes after they sat at the table, Natasha brought up  _ the  _ forbidden topic. 

“So, where is your daddy, Maggie?” 

Toni choked on her pasta as Natasha asked with coy innocence. Coughing slightly, Toni waved off concerned glances and focused her gaze on the plate before her, wondering if it would be  _ too  _ traumatizing for Maggie if she just stabbed Natasha with her butter knife.

“Mommy says you shouldn’t ask people about their mommies and daddies unless they talk about them first. Cause once I asked Olivia about her mama and she got real sad because her mama died and I didn’t know,” Maggie advised calmly and Toni let out a breath. “But—” goddammit why did she have the Stark ability to never stop talking, “my daddy isn’t dead, so I can talk about him.” 

Yeah, the floor was a perfect place to sink through. 

“Mom, do you want another roll?” 

“Can you tell me about him?” Nat cut off Peter’s attempt to shift the conversation.

Logically, Toni knew that her glare wouldn’t stop Nat’s questioning, but she still gave it her all. All the dinner occupants were looking at Maggie with rapt attention, especially Steve, who seemed to be bracing himself.

“Uh huh!” Maggie nodded enthusiastically. “He’s super awesome! He’s a time traveler! He came all the way from the past just to be with mommy. But then the past started calling him back and he had to leave, but he gave mommy me before he left so that she wouldn’t get too lonely. Oh! And he left me with my special gift to make sure I knew he always loved me and to keep me safe. Mommy says he probably won’t be able to find his way back, because time travel is really tricky. I think he might be able to, but talking about that makes mommy sad.”

Toni cleared her throat, “I’m gonna start on the dishes.” She collected any finished plates and beat a hasty retreat as she tried to hide her glassy eyes and red face. She placed the dishes in the sink before placing both hands on the counter and letting her head fall to her chest.

“What’s your gift?” Toni heard Sam ask.

“It makes sure that I can’t get sick a lot and that my bones are really strong. It’s my daddy protecting me even though he can’t be here.”

At her daughter’s sincere reply, Toni felt hot tears finally leaking over her lashes. Without turning her face to the table, she quickly walked down the hallway to her room, ignoring the questioning call from Rhodey in favor of being a coward. 

#

“I hope you’re happy,” Rhodey growled at Natasha before getting up to follow his sister. “Peter, please help your sister get ready for bed.”  
“Of course,” Peter agreed instantly, knowing his mother needed some time alone.

“Did I make mommy sad?” Maggie asked with concern.

“ _ You  _ didn’t do anything,” Peter stated as he glared at Natasha, the agent finally looking a tad regretful. “You know mommy just doesn’t like talking about your dad.”

“Cause he left?”

“Yeah, cause he left,” Peter agreed as he stared hard at Steve, who looked away and swallowed thickly.

“Let’s go, love bug,” Peter plucked Maggie off her chair and left their plates to be collected later. 

“I’m gonna head down to the gym,” Steve noted as he gathered his dishes and left without another word.

“Well that could’ve gone better,” Sam stated as he looked at the abandoned table.

The others couldn’t help but agree, exasperated. 

#

After the Rogues disastrous introduction and corresponding dinner from hell, Toni felt a bit relieved. She stupidly assumed that the worst part was over, but that was a mistake. In all the time that she had spent--four  _ years,  _ to be exact _ \-- _ trying to get the Avengers back together, she had failed to remember one, minor, teeny-tiny detail: Steve Rogers had broken her heart and left her to die, pregnant and alone, in a Siberian bunker. 

Ok so maybe she didn’t forget, more of forcefully repressed? Whatever. Either way, she hadn’t anticipated how gut-wrenching it would be to walk into the kitchen to see him flipping pancakes in the morning, or stumbling up from a nightmare to see him already watching infomercials because that was their thing and Toni still did it but can’t anymore because HE’S doing it. She needed a second living room. Only reasonable solution. 

So basically, Toni wasn’t coping well. However, instead of drinking herself out of the feelings (Maggie’s exact age + 9 months sober), she did what was her new thing and was something she never would’ve imagined doing before Maggie was born: She called her therapist. 

Within the Rogues first week, she had an appointment scheduled with Judith. The morning of her appointment found Toni shooting out of bed on the tail-end of what was becoming a worryingly-regular nightmare: Steve taking Maggie away. Breathing hard, she tried counting her breaths before she noticed the sunlight streaming through the window. 

“Friday, what time is it?”

“Nine in the morning, boss.”

_ That couldn’t be right. She woke up at six these days and usually to a four-year-old bouncing into her bed.  _

“What the hell? Why didn’t you wake me? Where’s Maggie? Is something wrong?” Toni’s voice rose in pitch as panic leaked through. 

“She is in the kitchen, Boss. Colonel Rhodes asked to let you sleep in. Boss, your heart rate is accelerating, is this a code gold?”

But Toni wasn’t listening anymore. Maggie  _ always  _ woke her up, what if someone had hacked Friday? What if her baby was gone? What if Rogers took her?

Sweating and breathing too hard to be healthy, Toni ran to the kitchen skidding to a stop and making everyone turn to stare. Apparently the Rogues and Avengers (wait they are the same now. Right?) were all in the kitchen for brunch. 

“Tones, breathe. What’s up kid?” A voice she distantly recognized as Rhodey came from in front of her and she jerked back at his sudden proximity.

But Toni paid him no attention, scanning for Maggie.

“Mommy?” A small voice asked, and that was enough to get Toni to push through Rhodes to get to her. 

“What the hell is happening?”

“Shut up, Barton. Not now.”

“Toni? Should we call an ambulance?”

“Rogers, I swear to god, let me handle this.”

Toni collapsed to her knees by Maggie’s chair and protectively wrapped the child in her arms. She distantly noted that she was trembling, but all she needed to do was keep Maggie safe. She wouldn’t let Rogers take her baby away. 

Though they occurred rarely, this was not the first time Toni had needed to hold Maggie. So the girl wasn’t scared, just a bit worried for her mommy. 

“Maggie’s all right, Tones. It was just a nightmare. Remember those breathing exercises Judith taught you? Three seconds in, five seconds out, sis. You can do it,” Rhodey said gently from behind. 

Resting her head on Maggie’s hair, Toni squeezed her eyes shut and went through her breaths. 

“Guess what, mommy! I’m eating pancakes and they have blueberries in them. We love those! I bet if you eat them you won’t be scared anymore.”

Her daughter’s energetic voice finally brought Toni back to earth, allowing her to pull back slightly to look her in the eyes. 

Maggie smiled back, though Toni could see some residual tension in her eyes. Oh the guilt. She had scared her kid, great just great. 

A final breath and an aggressive wiping of her eyes and Toni forced a brave smile on her face. 

“That’s a good idea, honey. You ok? Do you feel ok?” She couldn’t stop the questions or the worried palm feeling her daughter’s forehead for any feverish warmth. 

“Uh-huh. I have blueberries so I’m feeling very good!” Maggie squirmed playfully in her chair, making Toni overly aware of how she was on her knees, hands still holding her daughter captive. 

“Glad to hear it, sweetheart. You go on and finish up, mommy’s gonna get some coffee alright? I’ll just be a few steps away,” Toni slowly stood on unsteady legs, faltering slightly before Rhodey captured her in a hug. 

“Wanna talk about it?” He murmured in her ear. 

Toni shook her head. “Maybe later.”

With a final squeeze and a kiss on her cheek, Rhodey pulled away. 

Trying to avoid the Rogue’s eyes, Toni made her way to the coffee pot. 

“Excuse me, Rogers,” she muttered as she tried to get around him. 

She tried to ignore his slight flinch at the name. He should be grateful she didn’t call him bastard at this rate. 

“Are we going to talk about that?” Barton asked before being elbowed by Natasha. 

“Ow, ok geez. Just trying to get updates on what we missed.”

Toni steadily ignored them as she filled a mug with liquid gold, turning to lean against the counter and take a deep sip. 

“Do you need to see your heart doctor, mommy?”

“Heart?! Toni, should you sit down? What do I do?” Steve frantically questioned her, looking torn between respecting her space and throwing her over his shoulder and running her to the medical unit. 

“Stand down, soldier,” Toni said with a chuckle before immediately regretting her words as Steve’s eyes shot to hers, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. That was a common joke between them, back when they were a-well- _ them.  _ She cleared her throat before continuing. “Do you mean Judith, Maggie?”

“Yes! Dr. Judith!” Maggie exclaimed. 

“Yes, baby. I’m gonna see her today actually.”

Rhodey whistled. “My baby girl’s growing up, using coping skills and everything,” he teased with a playful shove as he walked over to get his own caffeine fix. 

“I am the  _ epitome  _ of maturity. Always have been, always will be,” Toni replied before sticking out her tongue. 

Rhodey snorted. “Case and point.”

“You’ve proved nothing. Maggie, tell Uncle Rhodey how mature your mommy is.”

“But you ate a lego last week,” Maggie brought up skeptically. 

“You what? Why?” Sam chipped in, great, a whole show. Fantastic. 

“I didn’t mean to, it was a small piece,” Toni looked up at the shocked silence. “What? Dummy put some in my smoothie and I didn’t realize for a few sips.”

“The fact that you have survived this long astounds me,” Rhodey dry planned, breaking the appalled silence (seriously it was a tiny lego piece, it worked its way out sheesh).

“Honestly, everyday is a universal surprise,” Toni nodded her head sagely. 

Steve cleared his throat. “Ok, but who’s Judith? Are you ok? Should we be watching out for anything?”

Toni wondered if she could figure out spontaneous human combustion, like within the next five seconds. Staring at her feet,  _ five, four, three, two, one.  _ Goddammit. No go. 

“Judith is my therapist,” Toni refused to meet anyone’s eyes. “So… yeah. That’s that. Rhodey can you cover Maggie from 2-3 today for that?”

“Of course. What do ya say, squirt? Wanna see if your garden has grown any more veggies?” Rhodey ruffled Maggie’s hair. 

“Ohhh yes yes! I hope Judith helps you not be sad, mommy. I love you,” Maggie was so precious and innocent it hurt. What if she was wrapped in a bubble? That would help protect her. Wait, no, bad Toni. That’s how serial killers were created. Right. 

“I’m not sad, sweetie. Why do you say that?”

“Cause your eyes look kinda like a raccoon and you get real quiet round the ‘vengers. Is it cause you miss daddy? Cause daddy was a superhero?” Maggie asked innocently. 

Fucking hell. 

“Daddy was a superhero hero, you’re right.” That’s good, neither confirm nor deny, and Toni swore if Steve stared at her any harder he’d dig holes in her skull. Well she wasn’t making eye contact either way, so drill ahead bud. 

“But do you miss him?”

Scratch human combustion, what about just flinging herself out the two-story window? That’s quick, right?

“Um,” Toni looked desperately at Rhodey, who looked like he was bracing himself for a train wreck. Thanks for the vote of support. “It’s complicated, honey.”

“You said that’s what adults say when they don’t wanna tell you the truth.”

Toni’s grip almost shattered her mug. “Yeah, yeah. I did, didn’t I? Sounds like something I would say… well, it  _ is  _ complicated though. Because I love you very much and you remind me a lot of your daddy. But you remember what I told you about dads?”

“Daddy’s sometimes leave but that doesn’t mean they don’t love their babies, they just can’t get along with the mommies?”

“Well that’s not quite the same wording, but the gist of it. I miss what he could be to you, but I don’t think he misses me that much.” 

A crack resounded in the kitchen and Toni swiveled her head to see a chunk of granite counter in Steve’s hand. 

“Did your daddy leave too, Mr. Steve? Is that why you’re sad? Cause it’s ok, my daddy left me too but mommy said he still loves me. I’m sure your daddy loves you.”

Steve took a harsh breath through his nose before answering in a clipped tone his eyes on Toni the whole time, “That’s very kind of you to say, Maggie. I’m ok. I’m sure your dad loves you very, very much. I guarantee it.” 

“Yeah, mommy says that too. Mommy, can I play with my LEGOs now? I ate a whole pancake!”

“Sure, sweetheart,” Toni answered numbly and distantly noted the sound of Maggie’s feet scurrying to the living room.

Once Maggie was safely out of earshot, Steve took another step towards Toni. 

“Can we talk? Privately?”

Oh god, no. That is the farthest from something Toni could do. Yeah, fuck that talking shit. She might force herself to go to the therapist, but that woman is  _ paid  _ to be nice to her. Steve? Not so much. But, for some unknown reason probably relating to magic (cause that damn stuff ruins everything), when Toni looked Steve over, saw his pale face and shining eyes, she, against all expectations (her own), said, “Okay. Let’s go to the garden.”

Steve seemed honestly taken aback by her easy acceptance. So much so that Toni was kind of proud of herself for being able to so thoroughly throw him off. So, ignoring their riveted audience, Toni took her coffee and walked down the hallway, noting Steve’s heavy footsteps following close behind. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers in the end notes if you are concerned about domestic violence and or want to know how Siberia went down in THIS fic (very differently than MCU)

The garden was a beautiful space. Shortly after giving birth to Maggie, Toni found out that gardening was a good way to improve children’s immune systems and combat loneliness. In other words, it was a win/win. 

Over the years, gardening quickly became a family past time for the compound members. It wasn’t uncommon to see Vision explaining plant mutations to a very focused Maggie, or Pepper in her only pair of leggings crouched in the dirt. Hell, even Rhodey would come and sit in his wheelchair (Toni still hadn’t perfected crouching in the braces, but she  _ will)  _ supervising Maggie and telling her nefarious lies (aka true stories about Toni as a child) while she weeded the vegetables. 

As Toni walked out into the warm sunlight, she realized that she now had to  _ talk.  _ Which was just horrifying. Deciding that being present was enough, she stopped at the head of the garden and waited for Steve to start talking. 

“I never knew you gardened.”

Odd starter, but she could work with that. “I didn’t. Well, I haven’t since I was little. Mom had a garden and let me help out for a while before she wasn’t home enough to keep the plants alive. I guess Jarvis might’ve tended to it, but I didn’t go out anymore. Anyway, I read that gardening is good for boosting children’s immune system and helps them develop empathy, so I, well  _ we _ , started this up a few months after Maggie was born.”

Steve was quiet for a few moments, long enough for Toni to wonder if he had developed the ability to sleep standing up while he was away, but he finally spoke softly, “You’re a really good mom, Toni.”

That. That was unexpected. But what was even  _ more  _ unexpected was Toni’s reaction. She had no clue why, but suddenly she was viscerally aware of how much she missed Steve. Not the one standing right next to her, the Steve after Siberia, but the Steve that had dated her for two years beforehand. The one that bought her flowers every Sunday and always indulged her long tech rants. The one that never failed to defend her to the press and gave sass as good as he got. She missed the one that loved her too much to leave her for dead. 

Biting back tears, Toni fought for control over her raging emotions. There were just so many of them. God, why did humans even need all these? Anger? Check. Sadness? Double check. Betrayal? Oh hell yeah. So, in the end, she settled for a lackluster, but neutral reply, “I try.”

“I know you do,” Steve said, still keeping his eyes on the garden, something which Toni was immensely grateful for. “Why—why didn’t you tell me?”

Okay, at least  _ this  _ was expected. “I didn’t know,” Toni admitted with a helpless shrug. “It wasn’t until after Siberia. I went to the hospital to get patched up, and well, there was one heartbeat too many. And after that, I couldn’t, Steve. There was no way. You know how bloodthirsty Ross was, he wanted any excuse to cut me down. And keeping in contact with a wanted criminal would be a perfect excuse to take Maggie away from me. I’ll never risk that. Not for anything.”

Steve nodded, “I understand. I wish I could’ve been there. I know I’m the reason I wasn’t, I know that. But, god I wish I hadn’t missed four years,” he let out a gusty sigh. “Maggie said you were on bed rest for your pregnancy, was that because of me?”

“Yes and no. It wasn’t because of Siberia, which I know is what you’re thinking. It was the serum. I am not a super-soldier, but in roughly nine months my body had to make a mini one. She was too strong, sucked up too many of my nutrients. And when she started kicking, good lord I had so many bruises. Little brat,” Toni smirked fondly. 

This apparently provided the kindle to break Steve. 

Steve’s hand had fisted over his mouth, eyes glassy. “I’m so sorry. God, Toni. I’m so sorry. I was so concentrated on Buck, I couldn’t  _ think.  _ I lost seventy years and then he was back and I was so focused on my past that I lost more years with my own child. I don’t—I keep replaying that moment again and again and it gets less believable every time. But I know what happened. We both do…” He took a deep breath, harshly wiping tears off his face and drew his shoulders back. “I want to be in her life. I’ll do whatever you need, just please let me get to know my daughter.”

Toni wasn’t proud to admit that she had absolutely no idea what to do with this information. She settled for staring ahead and worrying her lower lip, a nasty habit that spurred from anxiety and a lack of drinking alcohol. She was so terrified of Maggie knowing Steve was her dad. But the worst part was her reasoning. She wasn’t scared Steve would hurt Maggie, no her reason was more selfish than that. Toni was petrified that Maggie would pick Steve over herself. Terrified that Steve would somehow take away even more of her family, the most important part of it. 

“Toni?” Steve sounded so damn cautious that it took everything for Toni not to bow to his every demand. He shouldn’t still have that power. Not after all these years. Not after what he did. But he did. 

Finally, Toni peeled her eyes off the garden and turned to look Steve in the eye. Up close, she could see the red rims of his eyes, the slight shake in his left hand that meant he was worked up. His eyes were searching her own for any hint as to her answer, so desperate and hopeful. Goddammit.

“I’m sorry too, you know? I didn’t react well, though I’m not sure how one is supposed to act in that kind of situation. But I don’t blame Barnes, not anymore. At this point, I’ve been to too much therapy to hold brainwashing against him. And I’m not going to keep Maggie from you. But I can’t let you be alone with her. Not now. Not yet. I don’t—I know you won’t hurt her. I mean, physically, you’d never even hurt me. Even when after I punched you, which I am really sorry about. But I know you won’t hurt her, I  _ know  _ that. But I just, I need to do this slowly.” Toni watched him carefully, he worked his jaw for a moment but didn’t seem angry.

“I can work with that. Do you ever plan to tell her who I am?”

Toni’s breath hitched, “I don’t, I can’t,” she took a deep breath. “I don’t know the answer to that question yet.”

Steve looked from her face to her throat, no doubt catching her quickening pulse. Damn super soldiers. “Okay.”

Toni’s eyes shot up to his at the easy acceptance. She was expecting a fight, but she couldn’t pretend she wasn’t immensely relieved to be wrong. “Okay.”

“Does she like art?”

“Um, yeah. She, she draws a lot. Mostly robots and plants, but yeah. She must’ve gotten that from you, cause I can’t do anything without a ruler.”

“Oh, believe me, I am well aware,” Steve replied with a slight grin.

“Shut up, I’m a genius. If I need something drawn, I have people for that.”

“Uh-huh, sure.”

They grinned and looked at each other for a minute before Toni’s consciousness peaked back up and reminded her that this wasn’t her Steve. 

She quickly cleared her throat. “Is that all you wanted to talk about?” She wanted to kick herself as she watched Steve deflate in front of her, but he hadn’t  _ earned  _ that. He didn’t have a right to make her feel guilty. 

“No, no that’s it. I’ll get some art stuff for Maggie. Have a good day, Toni.”

And just like that, she was alone. Again.

#

2 P.M. found Toni picking the thread of a well-worn couch in Judith’s office. Her therapist, long used to Toni’s antics and the teeth-pulling ordeal that was getting her to share her emotions, sat patiently across the room. Toni hated the silent treatment, cause she  _ knew  _ it was a trap to get her to talk but damn if she couldn’t stand being quiet for so long.

“Fine. You win. Steve’s back,” she let out quickly.

Judith quirked an eyebrow. “I will remind you for the hundredth time, that I am not competing with you, but I doubt that will change your mindset. So, Steve. Tell me about that. How has it been at home?”

“Claustrophobic. The compound feels like a closet. Which is stupid, but I can’t  _ not  _ see him. Every room is a chance for me to run into him. But we, uh, talked today.”

Judith remained silent. Damn her.

“We talked about Maggie. He wants to be in her life, and he seemed really sincere, but  _ what if she chooses him over me _ ?” Toni rushed out the last few words, embarrassed over her own insecurities.

“Why would she have to choose?”

“Because he’s going to leave again, and I can’t let him take her with him,” she refused to make eye contact.

“I see. How do you know?”

“Excuse me?”

“How do you know Steve will leave again? Has he not signed the Accords? Has he expressed a desire to leave?”

“Well, no, but I just know.”

“You know, or you’re scared so you have decided to factualize the worst-case-scenario in order to avoid getting hurt again?”

Well. Alright, go for the throat then. 

“Toni?”

She was gonna make her say it. Ugh. “I don’t know. I mean, I don’t know, for a fact, that he will leave. So, you win this round.”  
Judith sighed, but didn’t try to convince Toni it wasn’t a competition again. That was a long lost battle. “How do you think you can navigate your relationship with Steve in a way that isn’t based on assumptions, good or bad? Do you think there is a way to be cautiously optimistic?”

“I mean, maybe. But what am I optimistic about?”

“That’s something only you can answer,” Judith held up a hand to stop Toni’s rebuttal. “What do you want from Steve? A friend? A co-parent? Or do you want a romantic partner again?”

Toni slumped in her seat. “I’m an idiot.”  
“Why would you say that?” Judith leaned forward.

“We both know what I want. I’m Toni fucking Stark, I’m notorious for bad decisions.”

“I didn’t ask who you were or how you  _ see  _ your desires, I just asked what they are.”

Toni turned to stare out the window, refusing to make eye contact. “I want my Steve back.”

“Ah. And how does that make you feel?”

Toni was going to push her head through Judith’s calming blue walls one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOILERS IF YOU ARE CONCERNED ABOUT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE (WANT TO KNOW ABOUT SIBERIA)  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> .  
> Alright, so here's the deal: when Steve and T'Challa decided to bring Bucky to Wakanda (post airport/pre-Siberia), T'Challa gave Steve a miniature EMP device that could paralyze Bucky's arm if need be. Fast forward to Siberia, Toni starts throwing punches after seeing the video (gets one punch on Steve before fighting Bucky), and Steve, knowing that Toni isn't thinking straight and isn't gonna stop anytime soon, throws the device onto her suit (she does NOT have the arc reactor in her chest anymore). Because it is a Shuri device, it works and paralyzes the mechanics of the suit without shutting down Friday. Steve and Bucky leave to go on the plane with T'Challa (as seen in CA:CW), but they wait to leave until help arrives to retrieve Toni. Toni doesn't know that they waited for her to be safe and of course feels wounded by Steve for keeping the secret. The one Steve defense added is that he wasn't 100% sure that the Stark assassination was due to the Winter Soldier. He found a file on their deaths through Hydra (which he DEFINITELY should've told Toni about ASAP), but he wanted more answers before bringing it up to her (shitty excuse). Though, when she asked him, he felt guilty enough (as he should) which is why he answered the way he did.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay, I've been traveling the past few weekends for work while also combating the flu (which is a bitch to conquer with my immunocompromised self). I'm posting two short chapters (because I like separating scenes) to make up one, regular-length chapter. Cool? Cool. 
> 
> Also, a different part of this series is coming out this weekend that features teen mom Toni and baby Peter so get pumped ;)

The next few days passed without any major events. Toni and Steve remained civil, but she tried her best to avoid contact. She had talked with the others and, after some grumbling, they had agreed to let Steve hang out with Maggie while they were watching her. So it became a common sight for Toni to look for Maggie only to find her already with her da— _ Steve _ . Just Steve.

Which was why Toni was currently standing in the entryway to the garden, feeling like a creep, and watching a mud-covered Maggie ramble about soil densities and plant fertilizer while Steve kneeled in the dirt beside her, watching the girl like it was the only place he wanted to be. Watching Steve interact with their daughter was so painful. It felt like everything she never let herself admit she wanted, but it could never be. At the end of the day, Toni was still alone, and Steve wasn’t hers anymore, but at least Maggie had another person around to protect her. Silver lining or something.

“Not that you couldn’t fix them, but those frown lines might soon become permanent.”

Toni tried—and failed—not to jump as Rhodey’s voice came up beside her. She hadn’t even noticed him leaving his perch as Maggie’s on-duty sitter.

“If I got frown lines I would rock them and we both know it,” Toni joked back but kept her eyes on the gardening duo.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“My thoughts are worth five million an hour.”

Rhodey breathed out an exasperated laugh, “Five million for your thoughts?”

“You drive a hard bargain, Honeybear. And I’m fine.”

“Nope, try again.”

Toni rolled her eyes but leaned against the wall of the compound and turned to face her best friend. “It hurts.”

God bless that man cause immediately knew what she was talking about. “So what are you going to do about it?”

“Wallow? Lay in bed in a white, Victorian gown and have you pat my face with a soft towel?”

“We both know I’d never do that for you,” Rhodey answered with a smirk.

“You see, the funny thing is, I’m pretty sure that was your entire job description while I was pregnant.”

“That was different. You were on bedrest, big as a whale, and always crying. If this happens again, then yes, I will pat your face with a soft towel.”   


“I would be angry at the whale comment if it wasn’t so accurate. Goddamn super soldiers.”

The two stood in silence, smiling softly as they watched Maggie squeal in delight at a ladybug landing on her hand. She delicately transferred the tiny insect to Steve’s massive hand, and something constricted in Toni’s chest as she watched him handle the bug with such gentleness. 

“I want him back.”

“I was afraid you’d say that.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as promised, here is your second short chapter

As—arguably bad—luck would have it, the next month found Toni waking up to a kitchen filled with decorations and a pile of warm blueberry pancakes. This would be a wonderful surprise if she 

1) remembered what day it was, and 

2) was in better standing with the Rogues. 

In the month since they moved back, Toni had interacted fairly minimally with her former-but-now-current-again teammates. Only two days before, T’Challa had deemed Barnes’ mind clean, so he had arrived to a fanfare that lacked a certain engineer. And though she avoided Barnes like the plague, she could officially do small talk with Sam, Natasha, and Clint for a few minutes apiece before needing to make a retreat. 

“Surprise!” The group yelled as Peter came forward with Maggie in his arms. 

“What is all this for?” Toni asked as she accepted a group hug from her kiddos. 

“Seriously? Again?” Rhodey questioned in a teasing tone as Peter started cracking up. 

“I told you, she never remembers,” Peter goaded in between giggles. 

Toni took a moment to survey the room and finally found the answer in a homemade (by Maggie if the state of the letters was any indication) banner. “Mother’s day! I totally remembered. 100%. Just like I do every year.”

“Mommy, you cheated! You saw my sign!” Maggie 

After transferring the wiggling child onto her own hip, Toni replied, “I used context clues, love. That’s not cheating. I win, fair and square.” 

“What’s your prize?”

“You two little gremlins,” Toni teased as she tickled Maggie before giving Peter a peck on the cheek. 

“So what are we doing today?” Toni asked as she made her way over to the pre-set plate and a piping cup of coffee. 

“You are being pampered,” Rhodey answered coming over to give her a kiss on her forehead. “It’s your day, mama.”

“Wait, do I actually have free time?” 

“You have 24 hours of it, to be exact,” Pepper crept up behind Toni and placed a kiss to the genius’s head. 

“No sh—,” a quick glance at Maggie in her lap had Toni pause, “—oot, no shoot.”

Peter, the betrayer, let out a loud and incriminating snort. 

“Are you ok, Petey-Pie? Cause it sure sounds like you have a whole pig stuck in your throat?” Toni raised an eyebrow at her son.

Raising both hands in surrender, Peter decided to simply refill Toni’s coffee instead of offering a reply. 

“Good answer. Alright, well I have free time, which I don’t think I’ve had since… I honestly can’t remember—”

“Last Mother’s Day, if you want specifics,” Pepper graciously added from where she was preparing her own drink, dressed in her only pair of leggings. Damn, it really was a casual day.

“That is incredibly depressing but feels correct. Okay, what are we doing little spawns?” Toni watched in amusement as Maggie turned around in her lap, facing her mother with scrunched up eyebrows and a wrinkled forehead, deep in thought.

“Garden, music, pizza lunch, movie, board games, cake.”

Toni was honestly so proud of her daughter. She had raised her right, this was the proof. Giving a confirming glance to Peter, who shrugged but gave a thumbs up, Toni replied, “Sounds like a perfect day, baby girl. You are so so smart,” she punctuated her last sentence with well-aimed tickles that quickly reduced her little girl to a giggling mess.


	7. Chapter 7

“Alright, what movie are we watching?” Toni asked as she plopped down on the sofa, dragging Maggie onto her lap while also reaching for Peter’s still-standing form.

The group was settling in around the TV, Steve in the recliner to her left (a bit too close for comfort, but not worth a scene), Rhodey right to her left on the sofa (definitely positioned himself between them on purpose), and the rest scattered on the floor, the remaining recliner, and Barnes sitting on a barstool in the kitchen, far back from the rest. 

“Um, I actually, uh, have a bit of a surprise for you, mom,” Peter stammered out, cheeks uncharacteristically pink as he wrung his hands from his position by the TV.

“Yeah, sweetheart? Well, I’m sure it will be wonderful. Go for it, love,” Toni tried to send a reassuring smile to her anxious son. 

“Um, ok. Here is a video I made from some footage I’ve taken over the years. Happy mother’s day, mom,” with that the lights dimmed and the screen lit up. Peter quickly came to Toni’s outreached hand and snuggled into her side, hiding his face in her neck as the video started up. 

At first, the screen was black with only the date. Maggie’s birthday. Then, slowly the very familiar sounds of a certain little girl’s first cries filled the room. Audio from the birth continued.

_ “Ready to meet your daughter, Ms. Stark?” the familiar voice of Dr. Cho.  _

The blackness faded to the actual footage of Toni, sweaty and gross after 15 hours of labor, on a hospital bed, Pepper on one side, Rhodey on the other, all three’s eyes fixed on the screaming bundle in the doctor’s arms.

_ “Oh,” Toni’s exhaled as the baby was transferred into her arms. “Sh, sh, don’t cry love, _

_ mommy’s here. I’m right here, it’s ok. I’m going to keep you so so safe, I promise baby girl.” _

_ Maggie slowly calmed to the familiar vibrations of the voice she had heard in the womb.  _

_ “That’s my girl, you just take a breather, yeah?”  _

_ “She’s gorgeous, Toni,” Pepper commented from her side as she gently touched Maggie’s wispy brown hair.  _

_ “Of course she is, I made her,” Toni commented jokingly as she fought to keep her eyes open. _

_ Rhodey, noticing her fatigue, ran a soothing hand through his sister’s hair. “Why don’t you take a well-deserved rest, yeah?” _

_ Toni tightened her clutch on the baby in her arms and roused her head back up from where it had been drifting onto Rhodey’s shoulder. “I’m not tired, I’m fine.” _

_“Fifteen hours of labor would knock anybody out and you know it.”_ _  
_ _“But—”_

_ “Nope, sleep. I got her, Tones. She’ll be here when you wake up, promise,” Rhodey slipped an arm under Toni’s and gently, slowly pulled Maggie into his arms. _

_ “Don’t let anything happen to her,” Toni muttered before succumbing to her exhaustion. _

The scene faded and Toni chanced a quick glance at Steve only to see him looking to be experiencing both awe and sadness in equal measures. Feeling her eyes, he turned to give her a heart-wrenching smile. She tried to soften her gaze in reply but was pulled back by Maggie’s question.

“Was that me as a baby?” 

“Sure was, kiddo.”

“I was loud,” Maggie replied which startled a small laugh from the group before the screen shifted again. 

_ The camera is propped up on something and focused on Toni as she sits in a chair with hands covering her eyes.  _

_ “Can I open them yet?” _

_“One second,” Peter’s albeit higher octave voice comes from the left of the camera. “Okay, open up.”_ _  
_ _Toni drops her hands and immediately starts cracking up, almost falling out of her chair. “Oh my god! Peter, this is perfect! Here let me get her on camera, this is gold,” Toni stands and grabs the camera, turning it to Peter who has a less than a year old Maggie in his arms… dressed up in a Spiderman Halloween costume._

_ Toni walks closer and her hand comes into view as she grasps Maggie’s outreached hand. “Maggie’s first Halloween! She’s really taking after her big brother.” _

_ Maggie squeals in Peter’s hold, flapping her arms in excitement.  _

_ “You are truly too cute to be real, kid. This is ridiculous, seriously.” _

The scene fades again and Toni immediately looks at Rhodey, “Do you know who that was? Because I swear I can’t remember who that cute little baby was. Surely not anyone I know now.”

“Hey! I’m cute!” Maggie protests from her arms.

“I suppose, but are you as cute as that spiderman baby?”

“Cuter.”

“Well, you heard the lady.”

Then Rhodey was shushing them as the next video started up.

_ “Ms. Stark you have to stop giggling, he’s gonna hear you,” Peter’s voice comes from behind the camera, which is facing the entryway to the kitchen.  _

“So weird to hear you calling me that,” Toni comments.

_ “I’m doing my best, you should be telling that to little miss giggle factory over here.” _

_ On cue, an adorable baby laugh fills the air. “See! It’s not me!” _

_ “Who isn’t you?” Rhodey’s voice comes from in front of the camera as he steps into the kitchen before freezing in place. “What’s all this?” He questions, eyes suspiciously shiny.  _

_ “Whoops, well, surprise! Happy Father's AND Uncle’s Day, honeybear!” Toni comes out in view of the camera and gives Rhodey a hug, a slightly older Maggie settled on her hip. “Thank you for being everything for me. For letting me fracture your pinky—still sorry about that by the way—and sitting through 15 hours of me cursing the world to bring this girl here. And thank you for every late-night feeding, more diaper changes than either of us wants to remember, and for just, well, for staying.” _

_ “Always, Tones. You’re stuck with me, you both are.” _

_ “Roro!” Maggie yells, disgruntled by the lack of attention paid to her.  _

_ Rhodey pulls back and discretely wipes his eyes before lifting the little one into his arms, “Hey, baby girl. How’s my favorite eleven-month-old?” _

_ Maggie rambles nonsense. _

_ “Glad to hear it,” Rhodey replies solemnly.  _

“Wow, the first ever Rhodey-day. Man, time flies,” Toni comments, glancing at Rhodey as he tries to dry his eyes. 

Clearing his throat, “Yep. One for the books.”

“Forever and always,” Toni gave him a peck on the cheek, ignoring the way Steve was staring away, out the window. 

“Okay, one more clip is in here,” Peter dragged their attention back to the screen.

_ Toni and Maggie, now at her current age, are sitting at a grand piano and Peter is filming sneakily from the doorway.  _

_ “Okay, which song next?” Toni asks. _

_ “The Frozen song!” _

_ “Baby, you really need to be more specific.” _

_ “The one that reminds you of when I was in your belly.” _

_ “Ah, you got it,” Toni pulls out a sheet from the stack on the piano. “You know, there was a time that your mommy knew more Bach than Disney.” _

_ “Bach is boring.” _

_ “Can’t fault you there.” _

_ Toni begins playing and singing: _

_ Every inch of me is trembling _

_ But not from the cold _

_ Something is familiar _

_ Like a dream I can reach but not quite hold _

_ I can sense you there _

_ Like a friend I've always known _

_ I'm arriving _

_ And it feels like I am home _

Toni watched as the Avengers listened, most in shock, having never heard Toni’s voice before and unaware of how well she could sing, but she also noted Steve’s reaction. He used to badger Toni into singing whenever he could, claiming she had the most beautiful voice he had ever heard. And, looking at him now, it was hard for her to stomach how he was smiling so softly, but also crying silently. She knew he regretted everything, even had figured out that if she were to offer he would come back by her side. But she wasn’t ready for that. Not yet. This sight though, it still pulled at her heartstrings. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is "Show Yourself" and we are all gonna pretend that Frozen 2 was already out because time is irrelevant okay? Okay. Also, this is what Maggie looked like in her spider man outfit: https://www.tutusweetshop.com/go/itemdetail.php?i=1388&g=1


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback to 2016, right after Siberia.

**Back in 2016**

After getting the news from Dr. Cho, Toni continued on as normal for as long as possible, which, for her, ended up being two more months. Those two months she tried her best to maintain her press image, went to all of Rhodey’s physical therapy appointments, signed all her paperwork and generally appeared unaffected by recent events. However, one morning in her sixteenth week of pregnancy, Toni was changing in her bedroom when she realized that her avoidance was no longer feasible. Because, right there in her full-length mirror, she saw that she was pregnant. Visibly pregnant. What could’ve passed off as bloating the night before had shifted to a distinct baby bump.  _ Shit.  _

So, she did the most reasonable thing possible, locked herself in the empty tower and hoped no one noticed that she was gone. She still hadn’t told anyone, having had Dr. Cho promise to keep it between the two of them. 

However, being locked alone with her thoughts was not as easy as predicted. Within a week, she woke up mid-panic attack from a nightmare. Not completely conscious, she stumbled down into the kitchen and immediately reached for her go-to source of comfort, alcohol.

“Boss, alcohol is not conducive to a safe growing environment for Little Boss,” Friday’s voice washed over the kitchen, startling Toni into dropping the bottle which shattered against the floor.

“Shit, shit, shit, fuck, I forgot. I mean, I didn’t, but I did, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Toni stepped back against the cabinets and sunk to the floor, all the while apologizing to the little life inside her. 

“Boss, do you need me to call Colonel Rhodes?”  
Friday’s question snapped Toni out of her spiral, allowing her to start taking deep breaths and calming down. “No, no. I’m ok now. Thank you for stopping me, baby girl.”  
“Of course, boss.”

Toni smiled weakly as she looked up and, as she took in the mess she had made, an idea occurred to her. 

“Fri, help me locate all alcohol in the tower.”

#

After a few hours of huffing and puffing as Toni directed Dum-E, butterfingers, and U around the tower, Toni was finally standing in one of the practice ranges surrounded by multiple boxes of alcohol. After securing her goggles on, she asked Friday to turn up ACDC and began throwing the bottles against the far wall, smiling freely for the first time in a long time as one by one the glasses shattered. Thoroughly enjoying herself, it took Toni a few seconds to realize that someone was shouting at her over the music.

“Fri, turn it down,” Toni ordered as she turned to see Pepper and Rhodey, still in his wheelchair, banging on the fogged door. 

Thinking quickly, she grabbed an empty box to hide her stomach before letting Friday open the doors.

“Jesus, Toni we have been banging on that door for the last fifteen minutes. What the hell are you doing in here?” Pepper seemed more annoyed, while Rhodey was silently surveying her (which was very worrying because he was too perceptive for his own good). 

“Sorry, ugh, didn’t hear you guys. I also wasn’t expecting any guests,” Toni gave a slight glare to the nearest camera, not appreciating Friday’s lack of warning. 

“Well, that’s what happens when you drop off the grid for two weeks.”

Toni grimaced. “Yeah, my bad. Sorry, I was just cleaning house.”

“I can see that. Is there any particular reason that you’ve decided to smash thousands of dollars worth of alcohol at,” Pepper paused to glance at her watch, “8:15 in the morning?”

“Well, in my defense, I started this at 3 AM, which is a much more respectable time for alcohol destruction.” At the unamused silence that greeted her response, Toni caved a bit, “I’m going sober. Thought I’d make an activity of it.”

Pepper perked up at the admission, but Rhodey just kept quiet. 

“Toni, you know I’ll always support you in that. There’s no reason to go off the grid to get cleaned up alone. We want to be there for you, help you through the withdrawal.”

_ Oh, that’s. Whoops,  _ Toni wanted to slap herself for accidentally misleading her friend. However, before she could come up with a reply to  _ that,  _ Rhodey finally decided to speak up.

“Put the box down, Tones.”

_ Fuck.  _

Toni stared at her brother, knowing that she wasn’t going to get out of this room with her secret intact. But she couldn’t bring herself to move her white-knuckled fingers. But Rhodey never left her hanging. Pushing his wheelchair closer, past a silently confused Pepper, Rhodey stopped right in front of his best friend and slowly took the box out of her hands and onto the counter. Ignoring Pepper’s surprised gasp, he simply took hold of Toni’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “You never gotta hide from me, baby girl. How long have you known?”

“Since Dr. Cho, after Siberia,” Toni whispered, staring at their intertwined hands to avoid both pairs of eyes. “I’m four months, this week.”

“Did he know?” 

“No. It wasn't, it was unplanned.”

“You keeping it?”

“Yes. I’m keeping her. It’s um, it’s a girl,” Toni could feel herself shaking as she fought to keep composure.

“Come here, Tones. You won’t hurt me, come on,” Rhodey pulled her into his lap and tucked her under his chin, wrapping strong, warm arms around his little sister as she finally broke down. 

For the first time since Siberia, Toni allowed herself to cry, to grieve the man she thought she knew and to panic over the life she now had to raise alone. Burying her face in Rhodey’s shoulder, she cried for what felt like hours before her tears finally ran dry. After a few moments of breathing, she felt an arm nudge her side and finally turned to face Pepper as she kneeled next to the chair. 

“Here you go,” she held out a box of tissues, which Toni gratefully took. 

After cleaning up her face, Toni wadded up the tissues in her hand and leaned back against Rhodey. “So, yeah. Cat’s out of the bag I guess.”  
That’s when Rhodey snorted before breaking down into full-on laughter. Pepper and Toni herself followed shortly after, stupefied that this was their life. After they all calmed down, Pepper helped Toni get up and finally made Toni look her in the eye. 

“Okay. Mini Stark. That’s fine, we can make this work. You taking care of yourself?”

Toni nodded. “No coffee or,” gesturing to the mess around them, “alcohol. Vitamins, three meals, sleep isn’t really easy but I’m trying my best.”

“Okay, I’m moving in,” Pepper announced in a tone that brokered no argument. 

“So am I.”

“What,” Toni swiveled her head between her two best friends. “One, Pepper, you have your own life, I don’t need a babysitter. And Rhodey, you need to be at the Compound for your PT.”

“I’ll move my sessions here,” Rhodey shrugged.

“No, I’ll just move back to the compound. It makes more sense anyway, better equipment for you and the halls and doorways better fit the wheelchair.”

“That works for me, I’ll go get packed,” Pepper got up and left, ignoring Toni’s calls of protest.

Toni sighed heavily and leaned back against Rhodey’s chest, letting out a contented noise when his arms immediately wrapped around her. “Y’all are dictators.”

“Yep, we are just so incredibly cruel for not wanting to leave our best friend alone and abandoned in a big ole tower. Terrible people.”

“At least you admit it.”

“Alright, budge up. Let’s get you packed cause I have an appointment at the Compound in the morning and I’m not leaving here unless you’re with me.”

“Bullies, all of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delays! Life is hectic for me as I try to finish my last semester of college (with no graduation cause of corona) and my mom has Covid19 so I'm a bit underwater. Sending you all safety and hugs during these times.


End file.
